Church signs

I get a kick out of some of the sayings posted on signs in front of churches. Some of them are quite witty, or at least quite pun-ny. Two of my favorites:

"Give Satan and inch and he will be your ruler"

and

"When Satan comes knocking at your door, simply say:
Jesus, could you get that?"

The second one I saw one snowy afternoon along Rte 40 coming out of B'more and it cracked me up for the rest of the day. I got the most vivid picture in my head of some Baltimore housewife in a housecoat, with curlers in her hair and a cigarette dangling from her lip, clicking the remote at the tv (think Divine in Hairspray), hearing that knock on the front door and going "Jesus, hon', could ya get that?" And then Jesus, in his homespun robe and sandals, turning off the vacuum cleaner and shuffling to the front door with a sigh, while a bright red, horned Satan stands outside peeking in the window...

If there's a hell, I'm surely headed for it